I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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