I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
