I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Randomize
