i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
