is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
