Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
