Did you just see the Batmobile???
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
