yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
