But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
They should really pass out barf bags in church
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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