id be glad to
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize