i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Randomize
