So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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