What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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