I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
