fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Randomize
