He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize