do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
