yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
