Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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