You're a womanizer and a bitch.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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