redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
