Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
