Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Randomize
