It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
