You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Just invented taco cereal.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
