He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
