At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize