are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
