i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
