Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
