Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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