Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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