I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
