hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
