So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
third nipple confirmed
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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