I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
So much Jack, so little girl.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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