Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
