I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
