im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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