o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
high people should be assigned attendants
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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