Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
