I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
