Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
It's never too late to be topless.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
