OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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