Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
