Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
