The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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