Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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