And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
