a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
